Wider Worldview: Amy Giddon on Building Empathy Th

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Transcript

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Hello, everybody.

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I hope you are having a wonderful Tuesday.

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I am so excited to be here. I

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just giving everybody a few more moments to

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happen in,

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and then we will get started, we were excited to be here with Amy Given.

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She is the founder

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and Ceo of the app, Daily

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Hello.

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Like aloha.

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And, yeah, we're gonna be talking to her today about empathy

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and

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building empathy, which, obviously, we need

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a lot more of in this world,

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especially,

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you know, in in light of of the recent events.

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And I'm I'm really looking for having this conversation.

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Awesome. Okay. I'm gonna go ahead and get started.

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Hi, everybody. Welcome to quieter Worldview, a podcast exploring the power of travel and how it can change the world.

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Spartan new ideas, foster or different perspectives, and catalyst curiosity and lifelong learning.

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I'm your host, I think.

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I'm a marketer by day,

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a passion travel journalist when I can fit it in,

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and a lifelong learner always

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I believe the power of travel getting outside you're known

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and make the world a better place.

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Join us for conversations from entrepreneurs, educators, and floors and get inspired to tap them the travel as an experiential learning tool

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an empathy built tool.

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Today, I am so delighted to introduce you to any Get,

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founder, and Ceo of connection and empathy at Daily Aloha.

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She is quite an experienced background in finance.

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She's acted as the head of women's leadership development at the Being Center at Bernard College.

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And it's been featured in the Boston and globe.

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Welcome of, Amy, we are so excited to have you.

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Hello, megan and everyone, it's really great to be here talking about some of my favorite subjects, travel and empathy.

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I cannot wait to

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just ...ask

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you all the questions. So I'm gonna get right to it. I'm not gonna wait any time.

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Yes.

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So I have this notion

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that if only we could get people outside of their nouns,

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you know, as hard in as complex and as nuanced and

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it's full of,

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you know even privilege as that is,

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I think that it could help us understand the world in a much bigger way,

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and see it in a much bigger way than just ourselves. Like, it can help us build your perspectives, help temper some of the that other that we've seen

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especially in recent events and in recent months.

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So how do you think Travel can

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help people build empathy and connections.

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Wow, That's that's a great meaty question to start with. And I love how you're framing that about

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traveling outside your known because that can be literal, like, physically

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changing locations to one that is lesser known.

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Are sort of, you know, metaphorical.

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There's so many ways of getting out of our comfort zone

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or getting out of environments set feel

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regular

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and known

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and you challenging

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ourselves by

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being,

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you know, in the presence of different worldview views,

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what even if we're online.

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So,

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which, of course, has been become more of our norm, you know, in the pandemic era.

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So it's a great question and I think we can think about that in our, you know, literal travel fence and kind of just fig

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sense of getting out of one's known environment.

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But in terms of how that can help

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you know spark empathy.

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It's pretty darn easy to to to believe that your view is the view,

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and that everyone else's view

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is wrong.

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And it's natural. Right? We we are we're are the stars of our own story

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we've developed a worldview view based on what's been passed down to us. Our experiences,

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our beliefs, what we've been exposed to in our lives.

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And I think it's fair to say that most people

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think they're right. And and not only do they think their worldview is you know, right, but they think it's moral. Right? They think it's good. They think they're a good person.

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And,,

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of course, and saved, divisive and polarized,

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time,

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we know that there's lots of people who hold vastly different views, and it's pretty helpful to remember that everyone things they're coming from a good hearted place.

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So, if you know, even just remembering that as we go about our travels,

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I think is is a good place to start that everyone, you know, just trusting and believing

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that everyone is well intention and believes that their way of thinking in life is

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is is good

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is helpful.

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I think though with traveling and being out of our known

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it it ...it helps us ...It helps

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start us a little bit and look for differences and look for same.

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I think it's pretty natural when one's out of their known element

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to look at differences,

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You know, I think we're we're wired to make sure that we're safe and in a safe environment and with people that are ...that

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are don't intend to do us harm.

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So I think, you know, we're always scanning for difference

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again, to keep ourselves safe.

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And that's important, and it's also delightful to find different. Right? To find different cultures and different ways of being in different foods and different dress and different different languages. Those are delightful differences.

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But there also, they magnify

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divides, and they keep us literally, you know, at a distance,

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so I think a great exercise when you're out of your known is to look for same,

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like,

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the differences often

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are

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different ex progressions

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of the same human needs.

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Right? So what what what's underneath those sort of outward

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appearances and expressions

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that I I can get under the covers of that and see how we're actually the same on this topic or as people or how we're feeling and you know, what I do believe that what you meant that as human is stronger than what divides us

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and some of it is just, like, flexing that muscle of looking for similarities at the same time that we're looking and acknowledging the differences.

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Wow. There is a lot.

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There's so much there. I could not agree more. And, you know, as you are speaking, I was like,

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well do you have any ...I ...you know, ideas for helping people to let their guards dumb because I do think you're correct.

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But then you kind of answer that question with looking for same

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seen this.

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And and we are more similar than we are different. And

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do you happen to have a a moment when

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you know, maybe that really sticks out in your mind

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when

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and if you're comfortable sharing, you were, like, very tr.

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Because you ...maybe you felt a little bit.

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I get ...like, for lack, and better turn that human fighter spidey or, you know, just uncomfortable, and then you sort of understood or were able to find some statements and and really

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connect with their surroundings Do you have an experience like that?

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Yeah. Yeah. I and I think what you're getting at is that's feeling a vulnerability right? And,

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yes. Right. And I think it's pretty

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natural for us to feel vulnerable

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when we're out of our element.

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And of ...out of our element can mean a lot of different things, it could be ...when

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we're in physical

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locations where you know we're disoriented said we don't know our way around. Certainly. There's a lot of vulnerability when we don't know the language that's being spoken.

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There's vulnerability when we think you know, we stand out. We may not look

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like the people

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in the place that we're visiting.

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And there's also you, a lot of long vulnerability was being aware

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that you might and differently

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than the people

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that you're with

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so all of those things, you know, create feeling of vulnerability. And as you said, like, it's ...it can be very hard, like, to let your guard down.

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And I I don't think you're talking about letting our guard down in a way that that, you know, makes you fit feel physically safe. Right? We're all gonna be wise travelers. Right?

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And be aware of our surroundings,

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but it's more that emotional

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vulnerability

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I remember feeling that

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when I was traveling

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many years ago, but I was in Italy,

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and I was traveling from

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Southern Italy

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to Greece on, like, this very type thing. I'm trying to remember where we left from,

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maybe one of your listeners has done this this voyage.

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And everything about it made me feel really uncomfortable..

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I mean, call ...I was with a friend,

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but we were among the only young women on this fairy

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there were a lot of

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of ...I think, Italian military guys is on this trip.

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It was it was at c, which is not

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totally my comfort zone.

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No one seemed to be speaking and on this voyage and we were not sure what was gonna meet us on the other side. I felt very tr on this trip.

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And I but I wasn't really worried about my physical safe safety because everything there was was well

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attended by the people that work there and they were ...like,

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it it wasn't my physical safety. I'm just extreme discomfort

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and I felt it in my body. I ...like I really felt it in my body. I thought maybe I was so sick, but I think you know, I I realized it was just such discomfort.

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So

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the way that we and it was just my friend, you know, let our guard down was ...by

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just showing ...like,

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a gestures of openness

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and willingness to kind of relate on a human level, even though we couldn't speak the language.

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This is gonna sound really ho,

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but smiling goes a really long way.

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There there's nothing more universal right? Than a smile.

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And especially when you don't speak the language,

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you know, it signals your

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openness,

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it signals, friend, it signals. I will I don't intend to do you harm if it's a genuine smile,

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and

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we ended up with out really being able to communicate kind of hunt down for this trip of the group of

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of people that were there. And

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because of our openness and making eye contact

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and friendly faces, we felt like nice sort of took us under their wing, and

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we're gonna make sure it was all okay for us.

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So it's very non nonverbal.

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And it felt a little awkward, you know, at first,

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but there were the physical gestures of openness

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and connection went a long way for us.

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I could not agree more. I mean, you know, it's really incredible

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that

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we are so similar in that body language. And and like you said, just a simple act of smiling, can't go a long way.

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And really convey so much more. It's like a pictures worth a thousand words well, and a a show of emotion is worth a billion.

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Something like that.

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And it kind of reminds me of something of yours that I read in another interview, and it it specifically talks about your app to build empathy,

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Daily Hello aloha.

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And and and you said, it's an opportunity

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for a mindful moment in your day, a cancel from

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everybody.

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Now more than ever we are aware of the death of our dependence during the pandemic, and we're all part of this bigger

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story.

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And to me, the story that you just gave was so

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queen to that, like,

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you know it it's just that ...at the end of the day, we're all just humans

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and, oh, you are selling back at me. I understand that you don't mean me harm. I don't mean you harm.

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Even you even said you felt like they took you under your wing.

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So now going a little bit into this whole journey of

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how you, you know, started what led you to creating this app.

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You know, we can learn a little bit more about it, but just a high level overview, can you tell us a little bit about

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what really was that pivotal moment for you, where you decided that we needed to create something and and build this community in memphis theater

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world.

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Yeah. Sure.

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It was ...it was unexpected. I will say,

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my career

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yeah, started off in management consulting, and

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and and then in financial services with American Express and other companies and I was always in big the corporate environment. I never thought I I find myself with the startup, let alone a text.

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But, you know, I've

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always felt

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this really strong sense that

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that everybody

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should belong.

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And I have memories of being a child and feeling really wounded and when I felt like another child was being excluded,

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I don't know where I get this from, maybe because I'm a middle child myself, and I always wanna feel like I belong,

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but it's something that it's really important to me, You know, as a human as a business leader

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that everyone

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feel like they belong, everyone knows down into their bones that they met and every

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every encounter

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should reinforce that

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and that everyone deserves to be seen and heard right and equal

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measure.

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And

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that's just fun, you know, fundamentally my personal value system

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and

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in twenty sixteen, with a presidential election, then

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everyone knows how divisive have been polarized it became

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but not only that, that just ...that led to des

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and other

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to an extent that I really didn't remember before in my in my

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life, and certainly not

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in an election process.

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And

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it really rattled me and

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no matter what side of the aisle, you know, you find yourself on there was enough other ring and not listening

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to go around and

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not only that, but

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everyone was making assumptions

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about the other and judgments about the other, and no one could hear each other.

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And then

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after the election,

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I was feeling, you know, just broken hearted all around and I had this experience in a New York City Subway station

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was something really simple, but that felt really profound to me, especially against this backdrop of heart that I was feeling,

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which was a posted note wall

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that

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kind belonged some down the walls of the union square, Subway station.

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It ended up being fifty thousand post notes.

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And there was this, you know, lovely common intention

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and invitation to participate,

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which is that these these notes to our notes of affirmation

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immunity,

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and hope,

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you know, that we're gonna find our way back to each other.

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After this divisive imp polarizing election.

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And I just ...every day, I was commuting here. So I I not saw the wall developed, I

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I started observing how people

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felt when they saw it that moment of decision to participate.

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Their thoughtful,

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you know, consideration of how they were gonna contribute.

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And invariably, they'd be taking photos and sharing them out.

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It was just like a small, but really powerful moment of transformation in their day.

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And I thought,

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you know, here's something so simple.

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And, you know, on a some wall that is reminding all these the anonymous strangers of our

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share human connection.

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And it felt so different than what our digital class forms were serving.

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Which was just, you know, an acc to all the division and de.

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And that was the moment where ...when I started imagining

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what could you know, what what could develop, what could be, what could be a new digital way of coming together?

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On a daily basis like we are on this post at wall,

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and that's sent me on the course.

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I love it. For those of you just joining us. Welcome. We are speaking to amy Given Ceo

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founder of Daily Hello aloha, which is an app that helps

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to create sense connection, and community, and empathy.

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It's basically the opposite of social media at this point. I actually just updated the fortune cookie. You can actually click that and check out the app for yourself.

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We are going to open it up for questions

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at the fifty five. So at six sixty five,

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six special sixty five. And,

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yeah, Amy, I

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I actually did it this morning or today, and it's just such a little bright spot in my day. I mean, the ...and I love that you kind of source the the daily hello has

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from the users, and people can contribute them to ask their questions to all humanity and

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I love it. It's kind of ...it's, like, replaced my meditation..

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I am really humbled by that. Thank you.

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Yeah. As I I highly recommend it to anybody. It's a really wonderful app. And and Amy, you actually have an exciting update

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that a little bit of ray news that you ...do you wanna share that with the the audience? Yes. Sure. It might seem a little cryptic without knowing how the app were

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But

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I'll tell you that I've learned on this journey. I mean, so much. I I think my case of learning over the last couple of years has been, like, the the the fastest ever.

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But you know that

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the cues I took from this post at wall

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it really became our operating principles for the app, and and

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it really mirrors, like, the conditions

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under which empathy

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is able to develop and flourish.

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And those conditions are

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lack of judgment

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and anonymity so that it takes away the ability to make assumptions.

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Right? And that everybody matters. Everyone matters the same

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and

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everyone is respond reflecting and responding to one simple daily question a day. So it brings us together in this collective moment of share reflection and sharing.

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So that is in nutshell, That's how the app works.

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And what I've learned from talking to hundreds and hundreds of users though or I call them really participants over the last year

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is that

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using the app every day,

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is is a nice, you know, mindful moment and thank you, Megan,

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but it also is waking them up to this feeling of

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of interconnected to all the other participants

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worldwide, and we're in about a hundred and sixty countries now.

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And it is a daily, you know, reminder of what we share. And also what what makes us unique and how we're part of the bigger human story

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So it's really lovely

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that people are feeling that.

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And I'm also hearing of the yearning, the deep yearning for even more

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and a feeling of belonging and empathy

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and matter in the communities that people live, work, learn,

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and in the relationships that actually matter the most to them.

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So they love this sort of am and empathy we're building with anonymous others around the world.

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They'd also like to feel that closer to home.

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So

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it's a great

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opportunity for us to really accelerate our mission of empathy building. And the way I talk about our mission is to gently place empathy back into muscle memory.

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By extending our platform. So communities to can use it in a private way to build empathy and belonging

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among their members.

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So we're building out the ability to have channels, private channels in the app,

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So community hosts

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can invite their members and the members can have this collective

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experience every day you feel closer to one another. So we're super excited.

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I love that. Do you think that you'll ever kind of get that branch into, like, physical communities. Is that ...oh, I love that car.

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I

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I have a dream

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that what was born in the physical world will somehow

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return to the physical world.

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So, you know, we have this ...this this post it. You know, if anyone tries to app, you'll instantly see sort of the visual cues of post in the app,

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and it remains really present for me. You know, as an inspiration.

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And now we have this digital product that

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collects, you know, responses and reflections across the world each every day.

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And I wanna unleash them because there are these wonderful

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snippets of our human.

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I love that they live in the app. I'd love to also see them

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returning to the physical world somehow.

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So if anyone has any any artist here,

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artists,

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people that work

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in the billboard

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arena

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your ideas. Put it out in again it out there. It will come

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Well that oh my gosh. How would meet would that be? It does just have a sort of public works

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movement of this. Oh, that would be phenomenal.

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Well, this has been amazing. I know I I'm gonna

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just open it up for anybody in the audience. Thank you so much for joining us. We here with amy Given. She is the founder Ceo.

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Of empathy and connection at, Daily Hello, How, you can actually visit the link in the Fortune cookie.

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I took out for yourself. It is such a little right ray of sunshine every day. It's

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it's just such a wonderful idea. So, Amy, I have a new segment that I wanna take you through called three travel takes,

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and they're just super quick little rapid and questions. So just say whatever comes to mind.

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So where is the first place you traveled outside of your quote unquote known?

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Oh, boy. This is gonna sound

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funny. But I I grew up in the Northeast East, but my grandmother lived in Bristol Virginia, which was really rural.

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And I couldn't understand what anybody sent down there, Their southern accents or so ...I

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was outside my noon, and I think he was, like, the first time I got a sense that

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people are of a place

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if that makes any sense. Yeah.

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Yeah. It make sense. Absolutely.

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So where have you traveled that was different from what you've expected?

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I went to Cairo

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and

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towards Egypt, and it was very different than what I expected in all the best ways, I think it was such a good example of how you need to venture off the beaten path when possible

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in order to get the real essence, not only up a place with other people.

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I'm so jealous. I we were supposed to go to Egypt over last March, and and we had to cancel it. So maybe one day, maybe one day,

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And the final three travel take,

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what is the best

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quote unquote thing you've brought back from a trip, whether it was an idea an object a relationship,

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anything Oh my gosh. I can name something in all of those categories, but I think what I have like, what's ...it's

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speaking to me, the strongest is food.

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You know, I gonna naturally

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have really

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expansive palette.

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So travel always been really good for me. Because sometimes you have no option, but to sample the local cuisine and

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it's always put me a little out of my comfort tone, but I always come home with much more curiosity

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about food and a willingness to get outside my comfort there.

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Have you ever ...have you tried to recreate anything

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fun or interesting? No. I leave that to the experts.

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Well, that I I don't blame me. There are some things that just can't be creative. And thank you everybody. I see some new faces here. So if you do have questions for Amy, about the app

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or about empathy while traveling or tips for building empathy or any thoughts at all. Feel free to invite yourself up. Or or request to speak on stage.

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Amy, I

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I just love the movement here. I'm also so curious have you ever spoken with any

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like, psychologist

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about empathy

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in the in the brain?

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Yeah. I've been super

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fortunate to be in conversation

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with several layout know empathy

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and some to some of them are psychologists, others are, like, social scientists, even neuroscientist,

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and

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the science

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sits squarely behind

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advocating for empathy.

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I mean, it's good for us as humans. It is good for us as

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in society and end communities,

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and it has very good things, you know, to the brain.

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So, yes, I've I I've done my research and

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learn from all the experts and it only serves to reinforce the importance.

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I love it. I'm a accused for science. We'll definitely have to talk that at some point.

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Justin,

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welcome. Thank you so much for coming up here. I'm so excited to have you. I hope you've enjoyed the conversation so far. Please ask away.

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Yes. I

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I I didn't catch the whole thing. I came in kinda of towards towards the end, but I I just wanted to share ...I downloaded the ...I went and I downloaded the app. Tried it out. Did my first swap.

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And

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it's one of those things like I heard it in theory. Oh, that sounds nice, but then I tried to and I was like, oh, well, this is pretty cool. Like, and ...I I didn't realize, like, ten of the emotion it would bring out and it was, you know, a simple prompt, and I shared and I I was able to do a swap with somebody else and see what they shared. And,

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yeah. Just something really powerful from that simple little prompt that the

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the daily aloha haul kind of set forward. So I I think it's really interesting. I excited to see it grow even more.,

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I love that. You for ...thank you for trying it, and thank you for sharing your ...I always love to hear someone's first touch because it's so fresh.

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And what you might have seen in the app just is that

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the the flow of it mirrors how empathy develops, which starts with self awareness, your own reflection, and then you have to swap as you mentioned,

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because

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and acknowledging each other is such a big component of empathy building

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and then seeing what everybody

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around the world as is a way for perspective taking, which has such a direct link to travel. Right? So, you know, we hope that through kind of the daily

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flexing of that muscle

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that you'll continue to be delighted. So thank you so much.

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Yeah. Most definitely. And it was really interest staying the ...well one just on the tech person, I ...oh, I enjoy technology,

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and just the flow of it downloading

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starting at. Quick quick. You know, like,

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like, try it out as a guest, Like, it just moved really quick. So the simplicity of that awesome so to the development side of thing, and then the actual like, content now that's something that's important.

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It's just really interesting the ...and

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anybody who's listening, I do encourage you to check it out because I thought

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you know, I I've done self reflection type activities and things. And oftentimes,

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it's

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a little bit more thought, than

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I I feel like I have the energy to give at that moment, and maybe that sounds bad and maybe I'm I'm am just too rushed and I need slow down sometimes.

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However,

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I don't know. It just seems that it was really quick. It just was, like, fill in the blank,

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and it still had, like, a really great impact. So, I guess, like, the barrier of entry, it's it's not a lot. It it's but it what you can get out of it in, like that quick little

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fill it in do the swap was really cool. I mean, less than a minute, probably of me downloading and trying the entire thing.

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So definitely worth giving a shot and I look forward to to using it further.

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Justin and Amy. I ...since I have you up here, I am also in the text space. By day, and I now where at a software companies send a little bit understand. I've always loved either experience.

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So is there anything to this where I get so much joy out of literally just filling in a blank,

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and then being able to hit the plus button and choose an option, like, that sense, if so ...it makes my brain so happy.

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Is there any science to that at all?

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Well, I would think it would be ...it's ...I think the choice and the ease of choice, so it's limiting so I I used to do

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parent education workshops, and

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we would talk about this a lot, you know, rather than saying

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you know, no. You can't do that or saying, sure, do whatever you want,

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providing, you know, the appropriate limits and structure

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around that. So, yeah. Oh, fill in the blank. Great. That got me to the next step. Oh, now I get to pick one of these, you know, like, do I feel happy? That there's whatever wasn't those feeling and then ...who then I get, like a sub thing where I can, like, pick a ...like, narrow it down a little bit more in the color change.

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And so it enabled me to interact in a way that was simple, but gave me enough choice,

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but did, like, over burden me with choices because we've a lot of choices in the day, and we don't need tons more.

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I'm Justin, I love it. I love what you said. Because

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we have really labor over kind of right sizing

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the the number of choices. And I agree with you. I mean, I

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struggle with decision fatigue. I don't need more decisions to make.

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But we actually started off with about a third of what we have now. In terms of options for mood selection and and connection stickers and the the little tools in the ads.

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And the overwhelming feedback that we've got from our early participants is that they wanted more

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because it mattered a lot to them that they were expressing themselves

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authentically. And the in the we gave them weren't enough.

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So

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we wiggle our way into the right, you know, I'm using air quotes into the right number, like, balancing between

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letting people feel like they're

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that they masked. They found something that matched their feeling, but not overwhelming them with choice. Like, it it it was a probably this ...the hardest thing we had to do in the app. So

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I appreciate your your comments about that.

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Yeah. That I love that film. No. ...it's like a child. Like, if you're, you know, say, they wanna get dressed in the or or you want them to get dressed in the morning rather than saying, like, put on this, you know, like, it giving them appropriate amount of choice for the child for the age, but, like, oh, do you wanna a pair where pants are shorts? You know, depending on the whether, there might be other consideration

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but sometimes assume the weather is okay, Do want pants or shorts?

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Great. Which cancer shorts do you want? Do you want the blue ones or do you want the green ones? And so just kinda, like, finding that sweet spot of of choice. You know, in the level of that. I at least for me, I think you you've found that

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kind of

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that area was still letting me dial in if I still want a little bit more choice, like, within the moods, I can kinda dial in a little bit more.

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A hundred percent. Couldn't just set any better myself. And the thing you said about decision fatigue, oh, my goodness. I tried to go by who's pace the other day. And I was like, can't handle. Like,

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i cannot handle it.

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I hear sister.

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Absolutely. Well, thank you so much. Amy, do you wanna tell us? I mean, we do have the

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the Url and the Fortune cookie, but for our listeners, you might be tammy in or listening to this just audio

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in audio format. Where can we learn a little bit more about Daily Ho aloha?

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And download be. Yeah. Sure. So to download the app directly, we are in the Apple app Store in the Google Play store.

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Under Daily Hall,

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which is spelled like Aloha with an h,

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and I'd love to just points out that we're free and ad free now and forever,

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I believe our

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our decision making use precious and our attention is precious, and we respect and honor that.

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And if you wanna find out more before downloading the app, feel free of this at our website at daily

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dot com.

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And if you reach out through the website or through the app or anywhere, it always always comes to my inbox. So I love to hear from you.

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Wonderful. Well, Amy, thank you so much. For joining us and sharing a little bit about your inspiration for building this app and just for empathy in the world in general,

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and building empathy through travel,

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I ...you know, I I really truly believe that just getting people outside of their nouns can really

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break down that other. So thank you for weighing in. Was such a pleasure.

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Thank you so much, Megan.

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Yes. Absolutely.

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Same thank again, everybody for Tuning in and widening your worldview view with us here. On Fireside.

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I'm your host Megan think you can learn more about white or worldview as well as green Amy's first interview with us actually over at w w w dot color curiosity dot com

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or follow us on social media at color dot and dot curiosity.

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We will see you back here Next week at Tuesday,

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seven thirty Eastern time, four thirty Pacific time on Fireside,

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have a wonderful evening and wonderful rest of your week.

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Thanks

Fortune Cookie