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Transcript

...

Hi.

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I feel like I wanna make up lyrics for that

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Right.

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for that for some of music. Think i

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Yeah. Because you never know... You don't would know what you're gonna get. Like you just start.

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I totally hear.

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Julian Han, How are you?

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I'm great. Thank you so much for having me. I so appreciate it.

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It is my pleasure. It's my pleasure to have you. You and I have been

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talking each other here for a few minutes it's nice to finally get a shit.

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We have

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we actually had the schedule on Fireside chat.

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to be able

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two chat.

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chatting But that's what that's what's so great about this. Right? That's what the purpose of.

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it is.

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It is.

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it is absolutely the purpose. It is the purpose. And so welcome to those of you who are in the

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audience.

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and welcome to those of you who will be in the audience.

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share this

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out.

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Yes. I'm actually, my Linkedin didn't go so I'm just

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jumping on here really quickly.

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there are their connection issues. Yeah. We're having... It's a

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Yeah. Which is fine.

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I'm just gonna go and find

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I connect to nothing.

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my r

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my level of litigation.

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really?

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Well, sometimes having to do it, like,

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you know, pay attention and, like, sometimes I surprise myself. I'm, like,

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wow I'm good. Like, I can do this as I talk. And then other times, I'm like,

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I

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flow on the brain. It doesn't work.

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I understand. It's okay. You're doing more than I do.

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anyway, miss this juliet, i'll just start. Well, so here's the deal. So we

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it it is almost November.

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I can't

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cannot even

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I don't even know what to do with that information. It's almost November.

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believe it.

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The same.

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I'm happy that my kids no longer wanna go to treating. I'm just saying that's to bonus.

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because

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And also, my sixteen year old that might have it I I'm... No. Like, you are not gonna be that kid.

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that shows up.

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with the pillowcase.

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who's taller than the woman

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answering the door.

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saying I want Candy. I like midnight.

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Right.

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Why didn't that? Why is that okay?

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why do we accept that in society? Okay? That can people like

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Oh, but there's so kids and I'm like, no. Like, you're... You can't open your door

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Right.

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you can't open your day today's world. Have some, like, sixteen year old There's, like, taller than you are six

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too tall with a mask would be like hey, You can't

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Right.

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no. Absolutely.

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I don't have a good. I mean... Well, I mean, I wouldn't use it anyway. Okay. That's the sorry way.

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No.

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Right. You and I love that. I love that.

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Yeah. I'm a parent. I'm talking about shooting children and Halloween. That's

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Well, you know what?

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awesome. I'm gonna get kicked out this time like five.

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right.

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Why did seventy gig kicked off? We don't

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push you gotten violent pigment with Turkish readers. We don't know what happened to Stephanie. We don't know.

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She was very angry.

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see.

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which is clearly.

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and I love Halloween. Love halloween. So, like, I've

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been dressing up for the from the day my family. And my dad used spent on this

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crazy haunted house, and I love love love it.

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And I feel like as I've gotten older, I've gotten, like, not a

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like, my kids at one point when we move there, like, we don't really have any decorations. I'm like you're right. So this year.

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I was like, we're getting the cobb. We're getting all. I even sometimes dress up

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Yeah. For sure.

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I still a twelve year old so she dresses up and then my sixteen year old,

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goes out with his friends and right. He he does

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he does. He's like, this year. I think he was like, I don't know. And I'm like, whatever.

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my twelve twelve year old and my twelve my fourteen year old,

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Right.

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does go out with a friend. He'll put like, a Jersey on you. They go out like a group of friends, and they still kinda do it.

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and my husband, I think, even is, like,

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What

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Think gonna get, like, an outfit and sit on the porch and, like, scare people because we're just like,

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like... And I'm like, you're gonna scare the kingdom partners. He's like, yeah. I think I'm okay with that. No much.

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Oh okay.

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Okay.

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Okay. That's that's everyone's mood. Dude this is died.

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Here's

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Feel like I'm a fun person, but here's my... Here's my thing.

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about Halloween that I still don't understand.

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I feel like the flip is it gives really

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closet weird people

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like permission

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to, like, come out of a closet

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and in ways that are like,

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not okay.

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it does.

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by the way, I'm not using the term come out of the closet, like, literally

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Right. Right. Right.

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do you? That's not what I mean. I mean, like, people who have the ten

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could be like, violent or, like, sexually

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bb art like they're Halloween they're like,

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right. Right.

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here At come baby, and you see these people like, walking around.

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sometimes the children and you're like,

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Right.

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damn. And then centers they don't have children, which in some ways,

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Right.

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have children.

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is a bigger problem. Like, you're walking around with children, but you have children

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and also,

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don't think you're okay.

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I think there's this weird permission that that people

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take on. I just and sent

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like some of the decorations I'm like,

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I'm not gonna be... If you was a

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family, and the grim reaper is standing at your front door. I feel like the message

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it's like are you inviting

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Right.

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death. I don't know. I don't know where I sit this.

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No. And I hear you.

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like like, halloween Juliet. I was so scared. I literally wanted to bring out

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like the baby is made sure my kids are, like, if you bring on an

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a holo.

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Right.

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Darren are gonna think we're staying something rubbing.

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I mean, like, I don't know. I don't know where I sit with that. I don't know.

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No. And I hear you. And I saw do you wanna clarify I'm not

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I thank you

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of those weirdo even though i knew like halloween. And either as my husband, even though he was so scare

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See.

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little children this this Halloween. We are not those weirdest.

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But I do... I do got it. I do get it.

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because and it's it's some... When of my kids were little, I feel like

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Right.

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you know, there was time... I was like, a wealthy question or I was a

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you know, I had, like, the b. I was like, the beach keeper.

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when before kids, you know, I was... I lived in New York City. I lived on Chris

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for and blink. And so we used have, like, the Halloween Like, we... Like we I would have

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Oh, yeah.

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crazy parties. And every home address, I was share one year

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I was a mermaid

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Oh, you are good Sarah. You were good share.

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Oh, thanks. I I think so. I'm in

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I feel like he were good share. Yeah. Sure it.

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I. And then My favorite costume that I got

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Patricia fields before I could I... Before I was making any money, I had no business

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buying this with my girlfriend.

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I was a mermaid, and I actually wore nipple cops

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yes

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And I had long blonde

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blonde hair. I don't have to send picture. I usually put it on my social media at

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Oh my god.

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during the holidays. I mean, during Halloween because I I always start my kids. I'm like,

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I'm gonna go with the mermaid custom because, of course, still have it, and they're, like,

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ill

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Ew.

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Totally,

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Also,

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do not... They're like, you... No. Ew. And I

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like laugh because I'm like, you'll never know. Don't know?

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Why did you dads why can dads

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on Halloween. I'm just... This is true, by the way, and I don't think there's even an exception

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dads could wear something super inappropriate.

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like a speed.

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Right.

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right.

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is never appropriate. It's just not like, I don't even wanna see... I mean, even if I think you're

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Don't wanna I don't wanna

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Right.

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But if you're a mom

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and you dress in something to i'm like like a vampire with like, kind of a low

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Alright.

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you're a whore.

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Right.

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what why that what is that, by the way? I'm serious.

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I don't know why that is

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Where's that?

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I don't know why that is. And, you know, it it is... I

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a hundred percent. I think that's ridiculous because I remember. like, I've always kinda like,

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I like Halloween for that reason. Like, I like to be able to be like, oh, I'm gonna

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I like to do the shock value. I I kinda live that way. Sometimes I say things that people are like, oh,

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Just she just say that Mic, yeah.

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was expecting that?

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I just said that. And so... How you is my kind of

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I'd like, go a little over the top. I know I have not worn the mermaid roommate costume years.

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mainly because

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I mean,

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I am in good shape, but, you know, like, I I I say to them when I'm

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eighty. I'm gonna wear it because my boobs will be down to my knees and I wear the nipple cups, and it will be really funny.

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right

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and you'll need it. You know it'll be. It'll be remarkable actually.

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Yeah. But

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I hope we're still talking then because I wanna know what that looks like kind of

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Again Yep. And

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So, Dan, who was my boyfriend. So this is like a very funny story. We

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it was when we first were really

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like, early on dating, And he was he was

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brave heart. And I can't... I cannot believe. I can't think of the name, but he had the past face. He was

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wow.

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it was amazing. And like, a bunch of his friends came

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and they did... That was the first time they were meeting me, and they were like,

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your your new girlfriend's naked. And I was, like, I'm gonna naked

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I was like, I have nipple cups on. You know don't you see my stomach. You see, I was like, I don't have big boobs.

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like, this is this is not naked. And if you guys think this is naked,

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If you show

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you are very, very conservative people.

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if you show any

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any

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breath. If you show any

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Yeah.

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it's either your dressed

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You're not dressed.

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Right.

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or you don't wanna be dressed. There still neutrality with this.

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Yeah. It's not.

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No. Totally. Totally. Yeah.

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So... And so, yeah. So... But then I looked thought was funny. So I wore that

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I wore once in San Francisco, and actually,

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I... A lot... There was a lot of tourists, and they thought I was trans diet, which I was like,

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Oh, no. I have I have a little bit of boobs. I know Like with my my my

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Okay.

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blonde hair, Nothing wrong with that if I was, but I wasn't. So I was like, no no.

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I'm girl. I'm a girl. I know I'm

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You're in San Francisco. It's like it's just... It's you're just like something. Yeah.

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Yeah. And then I was and then we did it on

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know, in New York during

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Durkheim Halloween, and then most of my girlfriends all wore.

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like, what everyone was like, I have to... I mean, I spent i can't even tell you how much money

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I spent on this costume. It was

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crazy.

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well, that was a religion my costume. Those are, like, beautiful legitimate

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professional

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Yeah.

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Oh, it was so fun.

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Yeah. Yeah. I've never done that people before. I've never spent I bet it was fun. I bet it was fun.

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Yeah.

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The most enough everything I ever bought was a vampire s

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I don't even know. Right? They had a really high collar and it went

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Yeah.

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all the way down.

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it didn't have, like, a net connecting, you know, the pieces

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Right.

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I I was like, well, I can't. I put it on. I was like, you. I mean, I couldn't be. So I feel like I

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I did tie. I I did type something.

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But

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Hi about. Right.

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you know, keep in mind, like, back in the day, I was in a republican political consultant.

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I show up at this

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Right. So you cannot drink.

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probably a worst Halloween party.

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ever fyi.

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I'm just saying, like, imagine a bunch of anyway

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I walk in this thing. I'm telling you the guys that were like,

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What?

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is happening.

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And I... Julia, the craziest thing is instead of me getting Embarrassed, I was like,

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Right. This is wanna i.

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This is what all of you impressed with?

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Oh, yeah. That Halloween party. I

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Oh my god. That... Well, so you wait

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there are people I am still in politics that that still talk about the holy party.

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Okay. That's so funny.

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they're like, you walked in. It was like, boom. Oh, it's, oh, no. It was

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it was the character

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fun.

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is kind of fun.

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Right. But but so that's what I love. Right? So there's sometimes that's fun.

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Yeah. And I think that's really funny that we were, like, in the green Room i'm talking about how we gonna talk

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parenting, and we've gone too completely the halloween is

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Halloween is a big

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calories

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bloody Halloween costume.

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super we're keeping a classy. Okay. By the way, I have something I wanna talk to you about because I been

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on you because I could not prior because I've just known you here. So I didn't

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Yeah.

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And you have a whole story about

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having your children gaining a lot of weight

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Oh, yeah.

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and then you had kind of a jury that you wanna proof a standpoint.

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And I wanna know more

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about that, and I wanna practice it with this.

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I think people need to be comfortable in their skin.

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Oh, totally.

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And

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whatever that is,

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is perfect.

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Yes.

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Right? Be comfortable in your skin. So for me, this conversation is not about. I

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is not of I've never subscribed to that ever. It's like if you are happy,

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Right. Neither.

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hundred percent.

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be happy and live your, like, live your life.

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Yep.

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So but I get... I decided i didn't know this. So I wasn't i clearly it wasn't gonna pay attention. But

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I was... Because I've been like, in Public Health and then, like, some science communications and other stuff

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part of the pandemic.

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when I first heard about December, I was like, oh, we're locking down.

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my kids are like, mom, you're so crazy. And then, like,

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right before the governor came out and said, oh, be like, six weeks. I pulled kids that

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Right.

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we're like, we're laughing death. Like, we about to this be pandemic And they're like, oh my god.

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So they're home for week going. Woo hoo. I'm calling you every everyday like you're really

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sec. And the the soldier are like, okay. My sweat? And then boom.

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you know, we locked down.

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Yeah.

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Well, here's what I didn't know about myself.

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I didn't know that suddenly,

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since we had no to go online, You know what? I have always liked Tod vodka.

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I love Peter doctor. I'm gonna have a Keto monica.

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Right.

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like three o'clock in the afternoon. I'm like, whoa. Because he was kinda fun to be able with you that

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Yes.

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except do you know what? There's a lot of calories in that. And you know what's handy about that? You

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short or three, And then you know what you want.

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a bag of chips.

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Yes.

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And then after that bag chips, you know what you want?

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Yes.

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that pie looks really good. Like, this is what was happening. So guess what?

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I kinda came to. I feel like in the last few months.

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and I got on the scale and again,

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I was getting some serious hints. Let me get an example of one of the indicators.

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I have a skirt. I have a lot of skirts.

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I put this skirt on, And, it went up

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like,

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I think... I mean I was above my.

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but it was not getting over this out. I do it's not

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Right.

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my skirt. I could feel my skirt say. I don't even know what you're talking about.

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Right.

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we can't even have a relationship more. This is not even

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you're not even in the right department. I was like,

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Oh my god. Also, being fifty three,

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I don't know if this happened to you, but if I look at a banana sideways or it

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Right.

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make eye contact for too long. It's like, a two pounds. Like, I

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And and, again, this is not the conversation about about being an a

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perfect waiter but. It's none of that. It's really about

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No. But it's about come... It's not being comfortable of your skin.

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Yeah. Which is important.

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Well, Ps, there's a math equation here. I have decent wardrobe.

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can't wear

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Can of it?

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black leggings.

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Right.

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my best friend, and then lock way wait so long story short.

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I decided, just because... Again, I could either buy a bunch of new clothes.

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Right.

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or I could look at my wardrobe go, and I'm... You know, and I'm not... Like I

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I don't feel comfortable. I can feel. I can feel the weight in my body and I don't feel comfortable. So

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Right.

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we were gonna have cocktails.

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I am having

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a stan Pellet green.

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with

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Lemon.

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I am

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So I am having a

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waterloo blueberry, because

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I have such a big week this week, and I was like, I cannot

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because you can

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No.

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hung around on Tuesday. Like... Yeah.

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No.

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so and it's so funny that you said that because I was like, I'll just put it in a nice class. And, you know, like, we're having cocktails. Right?

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No.

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Right.

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if this was thursday verified Friday, Yes. But I have, like, a big interview to

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and and and if Fireside chat, I was like, you know what? I don't wanna be like,

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looking for my words because that's what happens now when I almost

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Right.

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forty eight when I've had cocktails in there before.

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Right.

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Now.

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Right. No. I I hear you so I am now. So I am doing, like, a hardcore

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it's thirty days, but I think I'm really gonna do sixty days, and I know

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Oh good for you.

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i already know, like this is not hell... But I'm gonna do it anyway. It's a

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super super let's low low low low low calorie eye.

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Right.

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healthy love calories low. But I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna bang it out because I wanna wake up in January.

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I also picked the worst, like,

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It's... Yeah.

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Thanksgiving Christmas Car. So I picked

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sorry.

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the work... But actually like there's extra grit with that. You know what I mean? Like,

...

Yeah.

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I have to look at a pumpkin pie Be like, no.

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Right.

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And that delicious cocktail note.

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Right.

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So I'm just gonna I'm gonna just written through it because I wanna wake up in January, Be like,

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look at my skirt be like,

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You know what?

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I'm back, sister. Yeah. And I'll sudden have to buy a new one.

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I did it. Yeah. No. I get... Totally got

...

Yeah.

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Right. I totally got it. Yeah. Well, so

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I I played two college sports

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i I was, like, literally

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See, we're always athletic.

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you always athletic.

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Yeah.

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always athletic. Always athletic. And I think in in college,

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Mhmm.

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I did gain like, that freshman fifteen. That was the first time I ever gained weight, like,

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you know, I I was a kid and I know some people down there were, like, oh my god. She's never gain away for. I didn't

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Yeah. Good for you.

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I have really good jeans. I have to say that. We have... I've very, very high metabolism.

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and never had a hard time. I did gain that first from fifty

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Oh, yeah.

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teen because I i mean, i was eating pizza during you beer at, like, two in the morning.

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Oh, yeah.

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you know? And so... But was able to, like,

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stops to have it and was able to take it off. And then

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So I got pregnant, and my sister actually got pregnant at the same time and my

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sister and I are the same height, it's super super petite. And

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I have lived in New York City, and

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I love pizza. And so I was like, i'm god. I am

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Oh,

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going to go, nuts. And I had so many cravings. I was

...

Yeah. Yeah.

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nauseous. So I just literally ate throughout the day.

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i out the day. And probably and I'm super

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I mean, right now, i'm I'm not, but I'm usually super clean, like,

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really click organic and, you know, look really, really healthy.

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Oh I'm not putting even mean you that clean. You can need to just sound.

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Oh, you know. Right. I I should

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I should preface.

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You were eating claim

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Okay.

...

okay. Got it.

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Aiden and clean. Yeah. Sorry. I'm not clean. I'm.

...

sorry you're dirty. There's a solution. I bet you have a shower. Like, we can

...

Okay.

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And

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I know it's hilarious. Yeah. I i've not anyone that turns that off, like, oh, we're not listening to her.

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if I can get a chance.

...

right. They're talking being dirty with anyway,

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Okay. You clean. Got.

...

Yeah.

...

Yes. Eating clean so organic and, you know,

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Gmo free. Like, I was always, you know, but... But

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didn't deprive myself. Like, you know, I am sugar. Like, I

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people always don't understand, like, it's funny when people ask me, like,

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Oh, you always eat clean. I'm like, listen. I can eat brown sugar.

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and devour a honey. Like, I... When I say I love sugar,

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You love.

...

K.

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Okay.

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I love sugar. Like, I crave it. I love it. Like, I am not kidding

...

I... Even in my adulthood have been known to sit and eat brown sugar because there's nothing

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no other sweets in the house because when my kids her little, I'd be like, no.

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sc are back. And so I would be, like, eating that

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the baking stuff like, where it

...

So you're relegated to a bag process

...

Right.

...

Yeah. Or, like a honey. Like, I'm not even kidding like, I could squeeze the whole honey bar.

...

Okay.

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and it doesn't affect me. Like, it doesn't make me crazy or an

...

Yeah.

...

thing it's just I am run. Like, I run on more of a sweet tooth.

...

So... But if I have unnatural sugars,

...

Right.

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I definitely can feel it. Like, it the deserves my brain, Like, I can feel that I get more sluggish, not

...

terribly

...

Yeah.

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I had headaches. I mean, I just... I can't. Like, I can't even choose sugar

...

most gotten like that's became all that. I I makes me sick.

...

Yeah.

...

No. I yet. Right. I don't do any of that. Yeah. Totally. So I

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during my pregnancy was like,

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reese's peanut butter cups, like, every craving that I had. I was like, I'm just gonna go for

...

Yeah.

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like, you know, the you're... I'm gonna be pregnant. I don't know how many times so I'm just gonna go for it.

...

Well, I gained sixty five pounds. I was over two hundred pounds.

...

my coworkers called me. I was you norm

...

but it was

...

wow. They called you

...

But it was cut because my ankles were so

...

but it was kind of, like, it didn't upset me because I was such a small person before.

...

Who

...

Okay.

...

that it was like, we we laughed about it. Like, I was like, oh, oh my god. This

...

amazing sense of humor. Okay.

...

Woo. Okay.

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is crazy. I can't my boobs. Like, I never had boobs. Yeah. No. So I

...

I looked extract. I mean, I was

...

Okay.

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a giant enormous person. I was over two hundred pounds, and I was always like,

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one third, you know, like, one twenty five one thirty. So it I was big.

...

and every time I would go to the doctor, and I think about it now because I'm like, the doctors thank god, I

...

k.

...

I'm very confident in person. I will say. And I do truly like myself. So I was like, I know I'll

...

i'll work and take it off. Right? So the doctor every time I come in, I would have gained ten pounds

...

and she's like, you need to have, like, a glass of arms. Juice. Like, what are you... And I was like,

...

a gossip of orange juice. I want, like a sleeve of whatever.

...

Right.

...

I mean I am very fortunate that I didn't get any diabetic stuff.

...

I don't I I

...

I do not have one stretch mark.

...

like,

...

my body was meant to grow.

...

I don't either. I don't know why. Yeah. I don't... I don't either. I don't know why though. I mean,

...

Isn't that funny?

...

Yeah. I don't I mean, yeah. It didn't happen.

...

Some people, some people are just meant meant to stretch my sister who was pregnant at the same time.

...

who literally didn't show until she was eight and a half months. Literally engaged

...

twenty pounds, and she's judge marks everywhere.

...

I don't know.

...

she's like, with oh she's like, god... She is not meant.

...

Right. Right. Right.

...

Yeah.

...

her... Like, her skin is not meant to grow. I'm a more of a medium sized person.

...

Yeah.

...

medium bone. She's so petite. So

...

I gained. I mean, people would say, are you having twins? Oh, you must

...

Oh,

...

be having of your girl because my butt was huge. I mean, the saying that people would say to me,

...

i would bottle around, and then I gave

...

By the way, that

...

I just tell you really quick. This is what

...

Yeah.

...

Please.

...

I'm just gonna interject to two seconds. This is the weird thing about being pregnant if I may, which

...

I will never be again, because then I would actually be... I don't know. I'd be a global star. It'd be like,

...

like Janet Jackson,

...

and immaculate conception Also, you can't. But, okay. You did. We don't know.

...

Right.

...

I

...

I

...

really

...

hated

...

I I... Some people really can lean into to being

...

private and they're glowing and and even... I'm sure you were

...

probably going to. Like, even with the weight you gained, I

...

just I just looked like

...

a house. And and also understand this cute. I like myself too. So I'm not

...

I'm just telling you do I

...

it was

...

Yeah. Right.

...

it was insane to me.

...

dark would be like,

...

you're really getting too much weight. And I'm like,

...

cool. My option is that I could just be throwing up

...

all day.

...

Right.

...

and then you're gonna want me the hospital on a drip. So what do you i'm gonna do he goes, could you just not eat

...

like, as much. And I'm like, I don't even think that's an option. And so

...

Right.

...

that happened. And then

...

the next child, like, it just kept going. And finally, but for me, it was just about

...

I didn't feel good. I

...

Right.

...

I mean, it... I don't I don't... I just... I don't feel good. Right? And so it's just about I want to

...

you feel

...

good. Like... And with your... If you were that like, the t,

...

and then you gained all that weight. Were you having physical, like, was your back current really you actual is physical?

...

No.

...

responses to. Nope. You were fine. Your body's is like, no problem.

...

I was just, like, get dude the bottom. Yeah. My body was like, okay. You got this.

...

And I mean, I have to say I had... I did have an emergency with my

...

my oldest montgomery and that. And I had a really bad recovery

...

And that... And I mean, the doctor said no. That probably didn't have anything to do it, but that really sucks

...

because I and I was not a good pregnant person. I mean, when I was at work,

...

people were like, oh god You're so mean. I am a very happy, usually, very positive

...

person. And when I'm pregnant, I was meet like me

...

Oh,

...

like me and, like, but actually, my oldest so remembers when I had my other two. He was like, oh,

...

Oh,

...

like, and it would happen

...

like,

...

within days, like, my husband be like, I think you're pregnant. I think you need to take a task.

...

Oh my god.

...

Oh, you're kidding.

...

and I be like, why. And he's, like, because that person's back, and I was like, oh, she is that?

...

I just was like,

...

So a hormonal response.

...

Oh, my god. My hormones, and I have very sensitive hormones.

...

Oh,

...

Yes. Yes. Yes. Like, I know exactly, like, my top like, I can tell

...

to I'm very in tune with my body, but... And we got... We were... It was very easy when we got pregnant.

...

literally the first try. I know again, there's people in the audience because I

...

It breaks my heart when people, like, struggle. It I did not. But

...

have giving birth. My body didn't go into it. So

...

I was ten days late for my first, and then my other two, I act

...

What?

...

cast out because I didn't wanna have another. Yeah.

...

Oh, yeah. I took like a lot of cast, and I'm not gonna go do what happened.

...

I've actually done a podcast on it. So you can listen to how gross it is. I do not recommend it.

...

that

...

Yeah.

...

No. But what's amazing is you just kinda made a decision and you're, like, what is the most

...

heinous thing I do

...

Oh, yeah. I worked... I would

...

it would actually produce the... Yeah.

...

Yeah. And I was in the city, and I knew, like, it wasn't me that

...

had the problem was my son. That's why I had the sicilian, and I said to my doctor, I'm now

...

Right.

...

going to that again. I've never. Like, I've always been athletic, and that was

...

bad. And I remember

...

my mom and I went to go, I went to go your clothes, and I I was, like,

...

I'm a size sixteen.

...

I was like,

...

I'm a size sixteen. She's like, yeah. Got really big digit

...

she's like, wait... We know. We know.

...

Yeah.

...

you didn't you didn't notice that. And I was like,

...

Yeah.

...

I didn't think after I had the baby, like, two weeks three weeks later,

...

I'm still gonna be a sixteen, and so that's when it kinda hit me, except

...

I was, like, I'm having... I know I'm gonna have more babies. I'm just gonna... I'm not gonna go crazy. And

...

I took it off within a year.

...

Yeah.

...

literally took it off. I didn't do I nurse. I walked the dogs

...

Right. Right.

...

I didn't do any crazy form of working working out because I was like, you know what? I don't. I'm just gonna

...

Yeah.

...

I'm just gonna enjoy this. I'm not gonna shame myself. I'm just

...

Right.

...

buy bigger clothes and, you know, I'll put a little makeup on file top

...

Right. Right.

...

Right.

...

i give you know what. I'm gonna... I'm not gonna let this just

...

Right.

...

That's right.

...

Yeah.

...

finds me. I'm a mom. I've changed. Right? So

...

And then with my second, I gained a little less. I think it was fifty five pounds.

...

and I crave oranges, and then my daughter, I was, like, sixty eight pounds.

...

I kinda went there. But again, it took me

...

I... Again, with each of them, it took me a year, and then I hit forty.

...

and

...

Yeah.

...

I... My oldest is just like second and we were trying to figure out what

...

school. He was gonna be going to because the public school wasn't working for him.

...

and my best friend was diagnosed with frontal lobe dementia.

...

like,

...

Oh,

...

Wow.

...

before we were forty. And I went and

...

to a complete spiral. My anxiety was like,

...

insane, and I was literally having Ken trips chips

...

Wow.

...

and wine and for dinner because and eating the kids like leftovers because I just

...

Yeah.

...

couldn't control the two things that were happening, and I didn't handle it correctly.

...

and I gained twenty pounds for the first time, so I lost all

...

Yeah. Right. Right.

...

just, you know, naturally walking, not doing anything else.

...

And we were going to the beach, and I said to my husband, it was May.

...

we were going to the beach because that's in the summer, we would always leave and and go to our beach house, and I said to him,

...

And now mind you when I was pregnant,

...

big as I was. I always wear bikini.

...

Good for you.

...

because I was like, I'm gonna flo this. Like, I don't care. I'm wearing bikini. I wanna be yet.

...

so always small, like, little skirts that and bikini

...

So I was like, I'm gonna I'm wearing my bikini and I tried it on

...

and I said to him,

...

when did my buckets so big? And he's like, you know, I think you put a little weight on, but that's okay.

...

Good man.

...

And I was like, nice I can't go to the beach.

...

Oh,

...

was like, oh my god. I haven't seen, like, my friends and and I I I wanna work I don't even have a faulty.

...

Oh,

...

I was like, I don't even have a full piece I don't even. I don't wanna wear skirt. I'm forty.

...

I don't wanna be that mom and, again, not

...

Right.

...

judging anyone, but I was like, I don't. I've never I wore, like,

...

skinny little bikini. Well I pregnant two hundred pounds.

...

I don't wanna... Because I have twenty pounds on me,

...

to now wear skirt and hide myself. I'm not doing that.

...

So I literally found this program. I worked out at home

...

and I lost that weights

...

within two months because I started working out and eating

...

Well,

...

Yeah.

...

just balanced. I wasn't eating unhealthy. I wasn't eating balanced

...

Right. Right.

...

I literally was snacking throughout the day. I was eating tons of vegetables, tons of fruit,

...

Right.

...

Right.

...

tons of carbs, not enough protein. I wasn't drinking enough water.

...

That

...

And at that time, I was drinking to alcohol. And so

...

I

...

I quickly... You know, my friend was diagnosed, put into into home, I quickly and

...

this is actually... She... I saw her one day, and she went. Oh,

...

what happened to you. You got fat. And I was like,

...

Wow. Wow.

...

Oh, I was like, susan.

...

Oh, no. I totally got it.

...

but that's what happens with Frontal of Dementia. You don't have a filter. Right?

...

you're like a child. You just say what you your comes.

...

Yeah. And

...

Yeah.

...

I went Oh, That's stung, and I was like, I was

...

I was I was waiting for you to say it. I was like, I've known it.

...

Yeah.

...

and I was, like, by the way, it's a bit of your fault. We didn't know because we we didn't know if she was

...

Yeah.

...

Oh,

...

we thought she was actually having an addiction problem. Without thought she was using drugs

...

Oh,

...

she went to a rehab and then very quickly, she was not using drugs.

...

So I said door her I was, like, this is your fault, and I know you this and it's not

...

she's like, not it's not my fault. You're the one who was what are you eating? And I was like, oh my god.

...

so I've started working out because I also was, like, every time I was like, wow, that's

...

Yeah.

...

Yeah.

...

stung, and I've never had something like, kinda really sting like that.

...

And so I got fit within within three months.

...

Wow.

...

I was in the best shape of my life. My body muscle

...

Yeah.

...

was like, boom. I remember this. And, again, I have really good jeans. So that's

...

also, I... You know... And then I started working with clients. I started working with clients helping them

...

mainly moms, get back to themselves. I was teaching classes. I was teaching nutrition.

...

And then

...

and

...

I kinda burned down on it. After six years. I was really

...

tired of hearing, you know, my clients call me but were, like, I I have the five pounds

...

blues. But then every week weekend, they would call me and be like, I had a

...

cupcake. Oh my gosh. I... I I'm... I I'm and they be devastated. I was like, oh my god.

...

Right.

...

Right.

...

Right.

...

get over. You had a cupcake. Like, you need to live. You need be balance. You can't

...

Right.

...

starve of yourself. You need to be balanced. You need to have days

...

where you're having Pizza Margarita, and you can't beat yourself up, and that's something that

...

I didn't do. And I never did, even though I

...

you know, went that yo for those couple years. I wasn't after I ate. I wasn't

...

like, oh, my god I'm the worst person in the world. I was like, yum. That was good, and I'll deal with it later.

...

No. Yeah. Yeah.

...

Right.

...

Hopefully.

...

Yeah You know You know what I name?

...

I do. I do.

...

E

...

Yeah. So I kinda burnt out at it, and I took a

...

I took a step back that's when started my podcast, and that's really when I started doing, like,

...

consulting work with people helping them find

...

they're passion and turn into business because what I realized is a lot of the women that I was working with.

...

Mhmm.

...

a lot of them are very wealthy. They had careers before

...

and they stayed home with their kids because they they made a choice, but

...

a lot of them didn't wanna to.

...

Yeah.

...

and they felt like they had to, Like, I stayed home because I wanted to. Like, I had the choice, but

...

I decided I wanted to stay home with my kids.

...

And

...

and it's not for everyone. Right? It's not for everyone. And I and I think you need to find out what's

...

Right.

...

Right.

...

good for you or you're gonna go down one of these paths. So

...

I was, like,

...

these women are, you know, would say to me, oh, I wanna... I wanna write a book. I wanna start a podcast. I wanna do

...

you know, start of blog, but they would never do it, and I would watch some

...

Yeah. Yeah.

...

shrink and shrink even more, and then that's when they would gain more and more weight, and then they would call me and and

...

Right. Right.

...

like, I'm not a therapist. Like, you need to figure out.

...

So it actually was that's what made me start my

...

pod like, the the workshop and then do the podcast around the workshop. And

...

Yeah. It was really, like that journey of just being like, you have to do what's

...

good for you and what's important to you? Join what I name?

...

I do and I think what's hard is that

...

I think that

...

my wish for people would be that they can do something that they enjoy.

...

and make a living.

...

whether that's great wealth,

...

whether it's just enough,

...

I I wish that for everybody that isn't true for everybody.

...

Right.

...

sometimes that didn't even possible for everybody.

...

And I know

...

you know, I've had

...

plenty of things that I've done professionally that I hate.

...

like, back in the day in politics.

...

you know,

...

somebody screaming at you because their coffee wasn't exactly the right color, like,

...

Right.

...

Well,

...

that kind of crap. But I mean, I... You know, I worked hard, but

...

unfortunate, because I feel like I'm now in a place where I'm getting to do something I enjoy.

...

I'm enjoying Fireside and enjoying meeting people. I mean, all of that is great.

...

But

...

Yeah.

...

I think there's this sort of magic thing about

...

lives the life you love. Do what you love when the money will follow. And I'm like, yeah. But that's be

...

Right. It's not.

...

true. And I feel like right. And I

...

like, what the conversation we need to be having is

...

if what you love,

...

is playing the guitar.

...

but you suck at it.

...

and you don't wanna work at it, but that's what you love That's probably not gonna translate into

...

business. Like, it's not dog long gonna be a thing.

...

Right.

...

So what else are you good at? Right? So let's

...

talk or what things are you interested in, but I think

...

we went through this phase and my opinion Juliet of influencers of even

...

you know, clinical therapist who were like,

...

Right.

...

lives the life you but there were always, like hallmark things that we were saying to people with no

...

kind of

...

backed up. And so I think we were sending people in the world like, I can do this. I'm know about this, and it's like,

...

Yeah. But maybe it's not gonna work out that way.

...

Right.

...

Right? And then and and sort of... And sort of then went and what

...

is happy what are the happy life who look like? And

...

should we be striving for everything and happy because that's not life. Right? So what is

...

No. That's not normal. Now.

...

Yeah.

...

What is what is

...

or are we... Do we wanna be content? Right? That sense of contentment, Like,

...

Right.

...

I'm... I'm I'm peaceful. I I can take a nap.

...

I can work really hard

...

and I'm satisfied with my life, and I know that with life comes great joy and great pain.

...

and everything in between. And so

...

That's life.

...

None of us get out of it without great pain.

...

Right.

...

and then hopefully, some great joy as well.

...

also, Youtube Joy Audience.

...

But to me, it's interesting saying. I was having. I'm just curious about your reflection

...

on this because this is something you've been doing for a very long time. You've been

...

Yeah. No. And I I I have a lot of

...

Yeah. I have something to say about it. Too. Yeah.

...

Yeah. You have... I know. And I... And I... And so I wanna offer you kind of the

...

thought, and I i'd love to hear kind of what your thoughts are about that.

...

Yeah.

...

at fifty three.

...

I think where I'm at,

...

is

...

And what I know

...

Is that

...

when I stopped looking outside of me,

...

for happiness.

...

like something external.

...

Yeah.

...

like, you're not getting be started on the that i dated, Like, literally do not get me started.

...

I'm like, okay. Message seat.

...

oh my god. Ron. Okay. Got it.

...

But happiness for me eighteen

...

came when I did say, I'm comfortable in my skin.

...

whether I am the size. Right? But I've been I'm i'm I I actually

...

Yeah.

...

should like who I am, and I feel good about who I am.

...

I also

...

feel like I've got a pretty high level of emotional intelligence.

...

I don't spiral.

...

if I get mad, I don't

...

get mad if I'm happy. I don't

...

like, freak out where people like,

...

how's that cocaine? You know, you shouldn't do that. Right? Like, I don't... I'm pretty even. I feel like

...

Right.

...

and that is happiness. Right? So if you look at life, and then I would love to hear of, like,

...

your thoughts about all this.

...

Yeah.

...

Oh me too. Oh,

...

math was my worst subject, but it's weird like mass

...

life is math equation.

...

No.

...

our emotions are math equation. Here's what I mean by that.

...

We only have so much energy we can give to the world every day.

...

right.

...

that energy includes just getting dressed in having a cup of coffee. It also includes

...

if it's if you have children is taken care of children,

...

working. It's your job. If it's... I wanna watch a Tv show, that's

...

net energy too. Right? So you know that your output bucket

...

only has so much output it can give and then you go into deficit effect

...

you're making decisions

...

all throughout the day that equal how much of that bucket am I reducing based on the decisions that I'm making?

...

So those are, like, practical, then you have the emotional side. Right?

...

a boy hurt my feelings. Somebody I work with

...

said something bad about me. But whatever that story is,

...

Yeah.

...

that can be a deficit hit.

...

But how do you respond to it? Right? Do use spiral?

...

And I feel like we do a lot of getting other people

...

pull our energy that don't even really

...

deserve it. And so I think that reaching that place of

...

kind of piece

...

happy in my skin.

...

feeling like I've got a pretty high level of emotional intelligence

...

we like,

...

I reached a place in my life, I... It's like, I wanna go get my

...

executive Mba. Like, that's my... I have a friend of mine who who's doing that right now. I'm getting really inspired

...

I

...

totally can't do right now. I mean, like, then we are talking about drugs because there's

...

no way I to do it yes.

...

But

...

Right.

...

I feel like for the first time in my life is the

...

degree. I feel like this last four years we've been this... I like, I'm I'm happy.

...

Yeah.

...

And

...

It's also been

...

probably in some ways, the worst four years of my life.

...

like, post more smoothing at with my kids having to figure year it out, not be

...

having not been the workforce for while.

...

dipping into clients here and there, but nothing substantial and not even knowing that He's gonna cover the rest

...

didn't know what was gonna do.

...

but I felt

...

Right.

...

Happy.

...

which is soup... That's where you go. Am I okay? Can be, like,

...

you shouldn't be okay, but you're happy, like,

...

Well, but you can

...

Right.

...

You does that make sense?

...

Right.

...

but you're happy with you. Yeah. No. Totally.

...

Right.

...

Yeah.

...

And so that's kind of the place

...

Can I jump in now?

...

Oh, yeah. No god.

...

Yeah. Because that's the place that I'm at, which lastly is why I was like, I went in the mirror, and I'm like,

...

my last bucket of happy is... And because now for real, it is really about I just wanna fit

...

my gloves. Like, this woman like, well, what what what what wait Do you wanna mean? I'm like, it's... I

...

Right.

...

promise you it's not about that and don't make it about that for me because it's follows about. Like, I just wanna be back in my

...

closed. And I wanna feel good again because I just... I can feel the weight on the and it doesn't go good.

...

Yeah.

...

So that's it. And so is that really release... Is that the secret to happiness ultimately? Right? It's

...

the job you live whatever, but it's what one will you? I feel like.

...

Yes. So I... There's so much. And so I wanna try to collect myself, but

...

I

...

hundred percent believe, like, what you just said about, like, you know,

...

Oh, you just go out and follow your dreams, and that's what you're meant to do. I

...

really, really truly believe that whether you believe in God or the universe,

...

everyone has a purpose. I truly believe that deep down in my heart, not

...

everyone doesn't find their purpose, and not everyone finds their purpose at the same time.

...

And that is for many different reasons. I really believe that everyone just goes and goes and goes

...

and they don't stop and pause and listen.

...

And now I'm

...

attention deficit. So literally and, like, literally attention deficit

...

I do not stop and pause very often. But I know when I walk my dogs,

...

that is when I get the most clarity, and I've known that for years. So that is what I do.

...

every day.

...

it doesn't matter today. I didn't because we had no. I was like, oh, guys. I'm sorry.

...

definitely.

...

it's not doing it. But most days, whether it's raining

...

showing whatever I walk my dogs, and that is when I get a lot of clarity.

...

where I can listen whether it's

...

god or universe. I can hear what is

...

meant for me. Right? I can say, okay, This is what I would do.

...

So that is one thing. The other thing is, I think a lot of times, people are so

...

scared to even try, like, the person that sucks at the guitar

...

Yeah.

...

Right.

...

Right.

...

do they truly suck that the guitar? Or is it because they haven't put enough practicing in

...

and are they gonna give up too soon? So I do believe a lot of times, people give up

...

too soon. They are scared of hard work. They're scared of the failure.

...

and I think that's a lot of humans in this world. They're so scared of

...

Mhmm.

...

failure that they actually don't even take the the risks to do it. So they just

...

day in the life, they have. They're maybe not unhappy. They have days here and there.

...

Yeah.

...

but they're not lit on fire because they're just

...

kind going through the motions of life.

...

because they're they're fearful. And, you know, I know that's, like, kind of cliche because a lot of people

...

say that, but I truly believe that. I truly believe if... Like, one of the things in my life

...

I will never do is

...

be board or stagnant.

...

you know yes, There's days and I am, but I will always create something

...

like, I do kinda look love to live a little bit of chaos. Like, I

...

I thrive in chaos. I like when things are stirred up when things are just going even. I'm like,

...

this is a little boring. I mean... I need... I need a little

...

I need a little something. I need a little thumb some. So I sometimes will

...

create chaos, Like get another dog or, you know, I don't know Make life a little harder.

...

but that's me. So I know myself very well because I have gone through

...

life. Where okay. I've gone here. I've gone there. I've done this. I'm happy. I love this.

...

But I've, like, when I wanted to start the podcast,

...

I was like, I'm starting and but I'm terrified if I fail. I don't care what people say.

...

I don't care. Like, if my friends are, like, why are you all over social media?

...

because I have something to share. I wanna see where this is gonna take me. I'm gonna do the hard work

...

I'm gonna go and and get it done. So I do feel like

...

there is something in society where people are not working hard enough

...

I think there's people that sometimes work too hard and that path is not meant for them.

...

and that's where I think that they need to stop and listen.

...

Right? They need to be like, okay. I need to listen. This is not my path. But life should not be this hard

...

for me to get happy, and it shouldn't be this hard for me to succeed.

...

So there's times. And, yes, entrepreneurs, we know it's ups and downs of

...

and downs, but there should be every once in a while every day.

...

if you lock,

...

like, a little something that's like, I'm on the right path. Right?

...

I got that text. Let me think about that for a second.

...

people need to be more aware of their surroundings and what's going on.

...

I don't think people are

...

into that enough, and I also sometimes think people concentrate on all the wrong things. So, like,

...

when you were saying about, like, a coworker saying something to someone and that like a fax

...

I and I've always lived this way. I was actually just talking to one of my girlfriends one of my oldest

...

girlfriends, and I was saying to her, like, when we were growing up, we all have, like,

...

such a great group of girls. Like, we didn't have girls that really

...

Yeah.

...

Patty And if we did, we didn't really pay attention to them because it was like,

...

Yeah.

...

they must be in a bad mood. It's not me. So... And I remember, you know, as an adult

...

growing up and having, like, friends that would be like, oh, that mom doesn't like me or this mom does

...

like me and I'm like, well, why do you assume that mom doesn't like you? And they kinda would look at me and they're like, well, they didn't say hi.

...

And I'm like,

...

Well, did you say hi?

...

they're like,

...

Right.

...

Well, no. Because they... They just, like, walks by me And I'm like, do you think maybe they have something going

...

Right.

...

on on their life, and it has nothing to do with you that

...

has nothing to do with you. So, like, why would you assume someone doesn't like

...

you. Like, I've... And I'm not saying this in any, like, coffee, but I

...

would never think someone wouldn't meet me and not like me.

...

Yeah. Because you're not doing anything.

...

like, I am a good person. I'm a nice person.

...

Right.

...

you're not offensive you're? Yeah.

...

No. And... Yeah. I'm not everyone's cup of tea. No. Not everyone what's mean. Yeah.

...

sometimes I can be, you know, a little little, you know,

...

like, loud and when I'm at soccer games, I'm sure not everyone likes me.

...

Right.

...

but those people don't really know me. They see a a snippet of me. Right?

...

And I think a lot of times in society, people don't get

...

to know each other enough and they just assume, oh, they don't like me because that person doesn't like themselves.

...

And I love

...

And so they're assuming that other person doesn't like that.

...

Juliet, I love that. And I love to live by

...

you know, what you think of me is none of my business.

...

Yes.

...

like, I

...

Yes. Is that Brown?

...

I probably

...

Like as, you know what I'm saying? Like it's not

...

Yeah. I think so.

...

Oh, no. That's rachel. I think that's rachel House.

...

Okay. Okay. But it's like it's, but it's true. Right? It's

...

And, honestly, I really... I really really don't care.

...

Right me. Yeah.

...

Yes.

...

I care if I hurt someone, like I I care if I

...

caused injury to someone. Or I said something to hurt someone's feelings. I cared deeply.

...

Yes. Me too.

...

But if you're just passing me, but, like, right now, and here's my whole gig, I live in a county we're, like,

...

Nobody wears math.

...

at all. And I'm sorry listen. If y'all all somewhere in the audience is very mask, it's

...

like, it's fine. Don't

...

don't leave, like, hang out with us were cool people. But the we'll is

...

because I I take care of my mom, She was long. She's in her eighties, and I'm just

...

sensitive to that. And there's a trip to me that I walk right to behind I trigger

...

everybody in my wake

...

just speak because

...

I why you care I can think why

...

But, like, why does it... Like, why should people even care what you're doing?

...

like, to stay in your lane. That's what I say to people stay your late.

...

But, if this is my you're gang out.

...

do you? Why do you care what your neighbor does? Yeah.

...

this is my new thing now is if you give me a weird look or you, like, do this

...

me I actually stop and I go.

...

Hey.

...

Yeah.

...

Nice to

...

Me you also

...

See you.

...

I can tell this is really upsetting. I

...

Right.

...

It's so... It's it's gonna be okay. Like, I just literally say that now, like,

...

it's gonna be okay.

...

Yeah.

...

We're this really weird

...

And I think that's a weird... And we're in a really weird spot and everyone

...

Right.

...

not everyone's respecting each other. People are not listening to each other. Everyone's

...

Right.

...

jumping at people, oh, they're not doing this so they must be this party or they must be best.

...

Right.

...

Right.

...

totally

...

I'm done with it. I have I am... And I know you were in the political world. I am

...

not, And I haven't been in... Like, I have not. Because

...

either side, I and you're just like, oh my gosh. Everyone just

...

do you

...

Right.

...

Oh, I don't even recommend it. Like, don't. Like, I

...

truly.

...

Yeah. No. And I know. I I I can't even imagine it.

...

Yeah.

...

It's a nightmare.

...

because it is. It's like, who do you believe? Who do you listen to?

...

who, like, just everyone just

...

I know.

...

take of breath and just... We're all doing the best that we can. And I think

...

Who

...

that's another thing where, you know, like, you have people stressed in anxious and

...

Yeah.

...

Yeah.

...

and it's just like we all just need to be better. We just need to be better humans. We need

...

You really go.

...

to be better for ourselves, but for our children and for society and for this

...

Honestly,

...

country and for this world because we only live once

...

and why go at it where you're, you know, and again,

...

I don't wake up every day. Like, and, you know, my my kids will say makes up like, pretty happy most days.

...

Yeah.

...

but I am a positive person, but I also choose to be a positive

...

Yeah. Yeah.

...

a person. I have days where I wake up and I'm like, super grumpy. And I'm like, okay. Like, yesterday, I had a

...

a very grumpy day. And I was like, okay. I need to find the good in today because I don't

...

Yeah.

...

like, feeling grumpy? I don't like this feeling.

...

Yeah. Right. Right. Right.

...

and I know people go into the days and they just do that. And

...

you know, it's just... It's one of those things that I just feel like

...

everyone just has to do a little bit better.

...

I really do.

...

Yeah. I think we need to do better, and I think... And I think

...

the thing that blows me away is it's like, well we we can be better.

...

Yeah.

...

Like, I think we need to change this whole dynamic we have of

...

we need a recipe. Right? We need a nine eleven

...

where

...

Oh,

...

when those towers were falling, literally nobody was turning around saying

...

you're black you're asian, you're white. I'm not gonna help you. Like,

...

we

...

immediately

...

Yeah.

...

Right. Connected in our humanity, grabbed hands to try the same results and

...

That's how we connect

...

Like, that's when we all get together and connect.

...

Yeah.

...

I feel like it'd be great to not have

...

to have those happen. Also, we have short term memory too. Right? Like, we connected, and then all

...

Right.

...

and it was like, oh, that's right. We're different. And

...

you're gonna love this. So I was working on a piece of legislation that was

...

super divisive. Not because the

...

so should've have been divisive it's just because it was divisive from a political perspective.

...

and the behavior of the legislators

...

in both senate and assembly,

...

we're just shocking. I mean, some of the hearings and the the way they we're talking to each other, the way that they were

...

talking to people who were coming into testify on either side.

...

and a friend of mine works for publisher, and I ordered there's

...

eighty people in the assembly and forty in the senate, and I ordered

...

the snitch.

...

Is that many copies?

...

of the stages.

...

because

...

There are the Star Belly snitch where like

...

I love. Yes. I do remember.

...

the ones with the stars suddenly society. Was like, oh, like, you have to have stars.

...

Yeah.

...

to be cool, and now we all want stars. And then, of course, we have the Snake sales and show. I can get you

...

Yes.

...

stars. Right? And so he starts printing the stars, and then remember one day, he'll wake up and go.

...

Why.

...

Right.

...

who had the stars at birth and who just got the stars from the pressing machine

...

Right.

...

then it was that moment of like, oh,

...

like worst.

...

I love that. You did that.

...

Right.

...

because

...

we actually can no longer... Like, if you can't do it in just humanity and being just

...

Yeah.

...

decent human being. We can literally no longer of

...

board.

...

to wake up every day.

...

figuring out a, what we're gonna be offended about

...

like, that's a decision. Like, Gonna wake it today and I will be offended about something.

...

I know. Right.

...

Also, feeling being offended is a choice.

...

I'm gonna say it.

...

Yes.

...

it's a choice. You get to choose to be offended.

...

It is a choice.

...

or you can choose to not be offended. And also, don't give you people your energy.

...

Oh,

...

Well, that's the thing. If someone says something you don't like, just move on, like, they're not your people.

...

not everyone's gonna be your people.

...

not everyone's gonna be your people. Although, I have been known to say,

...

you know, I should be your people because I'm a super nice person. But if I'm not, you're... That's okay.

...

Yes.

...

but

...

I've done that too.

...

but I think that we need to choose to do better because we

...

actually can't afford to not anymore.

...

Right.

...

Yeah.

...

What's their what's our best example?

...

We're in this thing we call a pandemic.

...

and you know our way out,

...

is to all get together and decide that we're gonna get out together.

...

if the ship is thinking,

...

and we're fighting as it's going down or we could be as elegant and we on the

...

it right when they were playing the strings because they're were like, well, this is how it ends.

...

Right.

...

we love to play. We're gonna play

...

But

...

this is that moment where it's like, we are dealing with some

...

that does not care what your political affiliation is it doesn't care about your skin color. It like it doesn't care.

...

Right? And it's

...

Right.

...

we have tools to get out of it We wanna get out of it. I hate

...

we still have people that are getting sick at our hospital. I I hate it. So

...

that's an example. It's it's a gross example, but it is an example of, like,

...

We are so human

...

and all the list... The the list of shit that we

...

fight about every day, and that we think about every day.

...

the money that is raised to fund

...

things that are anti people

...

the money that goes into anti lgbtq campaign

...

Right.

...

the money that goes into. Like, we raise money and fund efforts that

...

hurt people.

...

I'm thinking

...

Right.

...

in a we children

...

food security in the station has gone a

...

to where over fifty five percent of people are students insecure.

...

Right. Let's

...

that doesn't include the people who are literally don't have access to food.

...

So

...

we need to raise the level of consciousness

...

in this country. And the only way that we can do that is by doing that.

...

Right.

...

Right.

...

and impacting the people around us. So when somebody comes at me because I'm have a mask,

...

I just try to say something Nice like, I'm

...

It's just I'm just doing me. Right.

...

I'm sorry. It doesn't matter like, it's okay. And I usually just come back and say it's okay.

...

Yeah.

...

Now I hear you.

...

And so I don't know. like, how so Doing, I feel like through much of

...

content you create. I feel like that's kind of your jam.

...

I feel like your your jam is to provide that

...

your jam is to tell stories, make people laugh

...

sometimes that people try through some of the stories, but

...

your whole thing is is to elevate the level of dialogue and say, look, like we're all in

...

together, I may have had some life experiences that things happen to me that can

...

help you. Right? Because I've been through something, and I can just add value

...

Right. Well, and that's every... Yeah.

...

and everyone has a story, and that's one of the other things that I always... I think is

...

so important. We all have stories and we can listen.

...

to someone that is a garbage manner or janitor,

...

the same that we can listen to a Ceo and, you know, a president of a company

...

everyone has a story, and we all can listen and learn from that person.

...

And I think that's one of the things that's also missing in in in the world.

...

is that the respect? Just because someone is not at the same level or

...

because someone lives on the different side of the tracks doesn't mean they're are less than

...

than you, because you're here, and I think that's something that needs to be

...

you know,

...

we we all have tragedy. We all have triumph. We all have, you know, victories

...

and we all are trying to do the best that we can. Right? I mean, I would say the majority

...

of people are trying to do the best that they can. And so I think that that's something that's

...

really important is just to listen again,

...

Yeah.

...

pause your body and listen to your neighbor. Listen to someone's story because

...

you might be inspired. You might be like, wow. I didn't realize that that story of

...

that is my objective in life is really to give a platform.

...

for stories. You know who what I'm gonna have on November

...

tenth is... Do you know, you... Did you hear the poly push?

...

he went from Logan Airport to

...

the the world trade center, so he was

...

Oh, yes. Yes. I did.

...

Yes. So he, like, pushed that

...

Yes.

...

beverage car, but he went after nine eleven because he was not on that flight because he

...

took off most of his career member.

...

Oh, Juliet, How cool. Yeah.

...

Yes. He and just for anyone that didn't hear this and then I'm gonna stop because I want him to show

...

Yeah.

...

story. But he went into terrible addiction for years.

...

Yeah.

...

and years and years and then

...

got out of it and in his sixties and was like this is what I'm doing. So you did that for the twenty

...

anniversary and had actually gone through my old town in Connecticut

...

Wow.

...

like, a bunch of my friends met him, and that's how I heard about his story.

...

Amazing.

...

and I reached out to him, and we just connected. And so he's gonna be on and

...

it's one of those things. He actually hasn't hand so he's figuring out how to get. I was like, oh,

...

right? The Android

...

That's a problem. Can you get an ipad or an iphone?

...

Right

...

So it's it's it's it's scheduled. It might

...

Got it. Got it. Okay. Okay.

...

Okay.

...

go on my regular my recorded, but it will be out.

...

at some point. But, like, his story

...

where he wanted to highlight

...

Yeah.

...

the, you know, the the crew members.

...

Right.

...

because he didn't feel like that they got enough recognition and

...

what that did to him and, you know, his story with with

...

the whole

...

Right.

...

I mean, substance abuse and and and I I don't even know all of it, and I can't wait to

...

Yeah.

...

to learn more because of how many people he has touched

...

with his story and

...

it's just important. It's important for us to all

...

listen.

...

a little bit more and have a little bit more compassion for our neighbor.

...

we don't have to like them.

...

we don't have they don't have to be our person.

...

we don't have to be rude and hateful.

...

I agree. And also, I would like to start meeting

...

people where the first thing is not who did you vote for or are you prom for pro, like, stop?

...

Yeah. Oh, I don't... I don't I don't I don't talk

...

Like, are you a mom to? Are you it? You know what I'm saying? Like,

...

Right.

...

Right.

...

I don't talk. Yeah. I don't talk about that stuff. And I say to everyone I was, like, listen, Everyone has their own thing, and I

...

Right.

...

know people from all over that I love and respect, and I respect to their decision.

...

and I wanna keep it. And I wanna keep it there like I wanna talk about.

...

And I'm not talking about this. Yeah.

...

I think, you know, coming back to

...

the Ceo to the garbage man to the everyone in between It's funny.

...

Mean, because that's a perfect way frame in the world that we live in.

...

It's funny.

...

the only way that we're gonna really make meaningful change is

...

I think people today need to be reminded

...

of things.

...

that feel really simple, but I don't think that they are anymore.

...

when my kids were a little

...

I was explaining that we were baking cookies during christmas

...

for the for the guys who works for waste management that were at the garbage.

...

and they're like, okay. How are we? Like, how

...

why, and it wasn't

...

Yeah.

...

why? Because they're garbage and my kids were like that. They were just like, oh, we've never done this before.

...

And I thought I want you to imagine and we talked about the president what the president

...

job as somebody talks about, you know, company owners in the dry person who owns a dry cleaner, And we went through all that

...

Said but let me tell you how important

...

the people are the work for waste management the pickup up

...

garbage every day. And so then we started talk about what happens.

...

Yeah.

...

if your garbage doesn't gonna get pick up,

...

like, literally what would happen

...

And what would happen if we kept picking it out kept taking it out?

...

and then we have no world to put it else was flowing.

...

Yeah. So important.

...

And then what if it rains?

...

then it's windy.

...

And then guess what?

...

we plague. Like, no no we have plague. We apparently do that well here. So

...

Right. Gross. There's they're stuff in it. Yeah.

...

And then once we watched through that it was like,

...

Oh my god. Like, they're really important mega go Yep. So we're gonna make cookies for them.

...

and then when they come collect the garbage,

...

because the think of like Christmas Eve or whatever.

...

we're gonna walk it out.

...

Yes.

...

like, we are going to walk it out on a pretty plate

...

with a bow.

...

Thank you. Yeah.

...

and say, you know, Merry Christmas happy Honda, like, whatever it is.

...

And I feel like I see a lot of

...

parents

...

who yell with their kids, like, be grateful. You know, You're not grateful or whatever I'm like, well,

...

if little Susie is growing up with an ipad and an iphone and a gucci purse

...

and like,

...

what it's great will look like to her?

...

Right.

...

it doesn't make her a little shit. It means what does that look like?

...

being grateful

...

is not something you just you shake this time and say you be grateful. It's something you to show

...

Show.

...

being grateful means that you can see

...

the jack's of someone else's situation next to yours, whether they're in a better place

...

our worst place.

...

And there's a situational awareness that occurs that changes the way that you see the world that I think is

...

really, really important.

...

And so

...

the way out in my opinion, the punchline the way out,

...

is not only through us raising our children through experience, Like,

...

Thanksgiving.

...

we would meet

...

yet.

...

we delivered

...

Thanksgiving meals, two people who were on hospice.

...

Right that.

...

for the families that we're there with their families because they couldn't, you know, they couldn't do anything. So I picked an profit.

...

that hospitals. And that... The kids would be... You know, I would just be delivering delivering, but was like, I just wanna

...

to teach them super early, like,

...

We have a lot of people that are pulled

...

or too hot or hungry or sick.

...

And the way that you develop a sense of grateful,

...

is that you see it.

...

And

...

Mhmm.

...

you help.

...

You fed someone who was hungry.

...

You had three coats in your closet, and you gave two their little girl who was cold.

...

Yeah.

...

you do it through service.

...

And so the crazy thing is in my opinion, the simplicity of it all,

...

is it we can just be in service to each other.

...

Like, if you called me, you were crying and you were sad,

...

moving on the phone with you listening.

...

is being in service to you.

...

Yeah.

...

which will leave you feeling heard

...

cared for scene

...

appreciated important

...

you long that last.

...

I mean, in terms that lasting effective

...

Yep.

...

find someone coffee in the line behind you. Right, Paying it forward,

...

Yep.

...

It's so amazing how simple in my opinion it is. And the funny thing is

...

if we could focus on things like that,

...

we wouldn't really care.

...

if that person demonstrate, how they felt about vaccines or masks,

...

Right.

...

or Trump or biden or, like, it doesn't matter anymore. Because

...

what did matter

...

Yeah. No.

...

is I was cold and you helped me get warm or vice... Do you know what I mean?

...

think that's our way out.

...

Right. Yeah.

...

Yeah. So I went so... I'm just gonna leave you with this because

...

So what I always tell my parent my parents, my kids since they were little,

...

is to be aware of their surroundings.

...

Yes.

...

that'll like, be aware of your surroundings.

...

Yes.

...

right, look around you. Now my kids... When they were young, we we lived in New York City.

...

And, you know, that's just hustle and muscle.

...

a couple years ago, we we... We were very privileged to be able to go over to Europe and

...

my husband was working in London, and my kids and I were in the underground.

...

and there was this woman with a stroller. And

...

she couldn't get up, and people were just

...

Yeah.

...

glowing by her knocking into her and

...

I turned around, I said, do you need some help and she started crying. She was like I've been standing here for twenty minutes.

...

and I've been asking people and no one will help me. And I was like,

...

Right.

...

Yeah.

...

that's disgusting. I was like, kids

...

That's right.

...

That's right.

...

this is exactly what I'm talking about. If we weren't paying attention, we wouldn't have seen this

...

That's right.

...

and those people that passed her,

...

most of them

...

Right.

...

probably didn't even see her. So it's not that they were wrong.

...

Right.

...

Yeah.

...

Yeah.

...

they just weren't aware. So they weren't bad people because they didn't help this woman.

...

but they weren't aware. So what I always say to them is be aware of your

...

surroundings

...

and really any time whenever you're out, just kinda look on him. Check around.

...

see if someone needs help. See if there's an old woman that needs help across the street.

...

You're right. That's right.

...

see if there's a stray dog that just ran across the street. You will see more things

...

instead of, you know, just thinking of yourself or being on your, you know, device,

...

Yeah.

...

Yeah.

...

or... And and it's I'm not saying that I do that all the time. Right? I mean, they're

...

times where I am, you know, blind by and, you know, the other day, actually, I like, almost hit a turtle.

...

I was like,

...

Oh my god. I'm I'm very using an animal lover.

...

Wait. Hold on. Where do you live

...

like, I don't think I've ever seen i turtle just case.

...

Where's you?

...

So I live it and what?

...

Okay.

...

So I And live in West to Beach New York. And become Rams. It's right next to

...

so turtles are

...

So it's at the beach. And so there's a lot of

...

Okay.

...

Yes. Because there's a lot of water around us. So there's turtles

...

I just had to pause and, like, you... Well how did you? Okay. What. Okay. Okay.

...

Yes.

...

this one escape from. Okay. Okay. Got it.

...

So it was like, and so

...

Turtles or thing. Okay.

...

I I couldn't turn back around because I had to, like,

...

drop something off at the time. But when I went back, I was like, please turtle, Like,

...

don't so they if you're... Like, if you're run, this is gonna literally ruin my

...

Yeah.

...

guy because I couldn't stop. But I literally watched

...

and I I... You know, as people were were going by, like, in my ruler mirror, I was, like, solid people

...

serving I'm okay, everyone else seems to be aware too because there's the person that's looking straight

...

looking all around, and that turtles is gonna get crushed, and I know that's just a

...

Also, Turtles don't. Our Terms aren't known for, like, being able to be like blue cars and, like

...

getting out of the way.

...

No.

...

they're super slow.

...

Right.

...

they're like, blue car, and then they're like this. Your process and outcome is not

...

is not gonna be great.

...

Right.

...

No. But so my whole point of the turtle is

...

but people were swirling, pay attention.

...

people were serving, and I was like, oh, okay. So now

...

I I feel good that, like, I can't turn around. There was, like, a traffic jam. I couldn't get back

...

to this turtle, but it bothered me until I was able to go and see that it was not sm.

...

Okay.

...

that would... Yeah.

...

in the ground. And not saying that I'm a better person because I do that

...

that is one thing that I do raise my kids to do. I I raised them

...

to be

...

awareness.

...

Mhmm.

...

where. And I am aware I look around

...

Yeah.

...

I... You know, even if you're in school and kids are doing something that you they shouldn't be doing,

...

just walk away, be aware of it, You know, just be aware, Just be aware.

...

I also feel like hang off of what Julia just said as we

...

head towards the top of the hour. I do think it's important. They

...

you were one of those people that were walking by that woman that Julia talked about when her on kids in her

...

stop to help. If you were one of those people that looked you're like,

...

and I'm busy.

...

you are at full.

...

Yeah.

...

and then my as a life coach, I will... I'm not life, but as your life coach for tonight,

...

just don't be asshole.

...

Right.

...

like if that's the baseline, If you go, I feel like I'm big an asshole.

...

pause.

...

and then, like, don't be an asshole.

...

Don't be apple.

...

wait just and figure that out and do what you can in that moment. You know what I mean?

...

just

...

Yeah.

...

And... Yep. And when I so

...

So that's literally what I say to my kids when they go out.

...

be aware of your surroundings and don't be an asshole.

...

I feel like that just this

...

what,

...

don't do that.

...

Very simple. It's very simple, and that's everyone in the world to be

...

be aware of your surroundings, and don't be an asshole. And you know what? The world would be a better place.

...

seriously.

...

Just that... Can we do those two things?

...

Yeah.

...

Yeah. I I'm

...

I feel like we should do those two things.

...

do things. Just look around, You see if someone needs healthy and and just don't be an s

...

home

...

And my kids always will... I mean, my kids are not assholes, and so they always laugh.

...

but I'm like,

...

you know, we all sometimes can be and not on purpose. Right?

...

Absolutely. Yes.

...

But

...

but just be aware of it it.

...

Yeah. Because most of we have enough... We just have people that just are

...

apples and

...

Right. They're just born asshole

...

The... And they're going to keep the

...

oh

...

doing that. And so we have to combat that ratio by making sure

...

that we are not.

...

Yes.

...

and so, I could talk for another developers.

...

But

...

I know. We'll have to do this again.

...

people are, before yet, and I

...

wrap up. I wanted to first, thank those of you who have joined this

...

I don't even know what to call this. We really didn't. There was no plan. We are just

...

So right sell.

...

we are just talking about life so

...

But if anybody in the audience did feel like they wanted to add value to this,

...

odd conversation or you know, more some natural you wanna share? You are more than welcome

...

to join our conversation. I want credit

...

to the fact that I did listen. I'm listening, and so when you said I hit a turtle.

...

You did. Right. You're were like, whoa.

...

that was a moment for me where like, I have a question.

...

Yes.

...

so questions. And if you do not wanna

...

join Julian, and I will wrap up, but I also wanna say thank

...

for joining us tonight and saying with us tonight because you have a lot of decisions you

...

make a lot of places you could be, and you choose

...

you chose the finger with us. And so thank you for that. I I

...

Yes. Thank you guys.

...

I don't totally know why. but I know you've got some felt you

...

Well, I think we're very entered this is again, I think we're entertained

...

we hold a great conversation, and we tell good stories.

...

and that's what this platform is about. Right?

...

connecting

...

But I think... Yeah, it is. And I think it's... And I think it is

...

and it's... And it's honestly

...

what I love about podcaster in general, and then we now have this sort video element.

...

is that

...

I know that I feel better when I am either participating in or I'm witnessing say

...

authentic communication. We are all human, and we are all here having a human experience.

...

Yes.

...

and that experience can be wonderful, and it can lead tragic and everything in between. And so

...

I think you and I

...

full stuff that's, you know, all of the objects. So

...

Thank you.

...

as we do wrap up Julia, I wanna say thank you for

...

spending the time with me tonight to have this conversation. It's been really

...

it's been really fun. I love the content that you are producing.

...

and

...

Thank you.

...

all have you back so we can talk about some of your upcoming exciting projects you have on the horizon.

...

Yes. I appreciate it.

...

we still need to talk about the media.

...

Yes.

...

Don't forget when you hear that. I love you.

...

I

...

Yes. You said you said you sent me those dates. You send me those dates and I will be there.

...

I I will help you.

...

And then I look forward to not only getting more

...

from you here as a creator on Fireside, but another conversation that we will have again,

...

what day sound, that I will very much look forward to. I think you are

...

I think you are a treasure, and I love that you're intention

...

is to is to just make life a little better, a little lighter

...

a little more relatable and maybe just a little bit of a moment to escape and just

...

relax and enjoy.

...

Thank you.

...

So I appreciate that about you.

...

and and you and you do that.

...

I appreciate it. Thank you.

...

So you... In back your time. I'm sitting here going. I'm tired It's six

...

o'clock. And I'm like, oh my god.

...

It's not. I get up at

...

five twenty. So it is

...

it is is

...

I think you have at four thirty.

...

Wow. Good for you.

...

I... Yeah.

...

What like are you doing it on purpose?

...

I don't know. I don't think it is good for me. Actually, I think it's really frustrating for me.

...

Yeah.

...

Right.

...

work... Yeah. You actually really bad for me. Woo. It's rough.

...

It's rough. Anyway,

...

Julia,

...

well make sure you get to bed early. Yes.

...

You have a fantastic evening. Thank you so much for joining me tonight, and we will

...

forward to reconnecting here on Fireside.

...

Yes. Thank you.

...

very soon.

...

Thank you, Stephanie.

...

Thank you.

...

by

...

Thanks, everybody for joining us.

...

This feels like the music

...

that is being played

...

like, as people were pulling up to a wedding,

...

Yes.

...

and you're getting handed to glass of wine.

...

Yes.

...

I

...

So here. Cheers.

...

Okay. So cheers. That's what we'll do. Me.

...

cheers.

...

because we've been so elegant tonight.

...

Everybody stay safe. Stay well, stay happy.

...

and take care of somebody in your life. Just do it for a day. It'll make you feel good make them feel good too

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